FateDoki-Doki Ataraxia
by Nonexistent Guy
Summary: The casts of Fate/Stay Night are all sucked into a galge created by Avenger replacing the Grail War he created and out of his boredom. Shirou and Bazett are the main protagonists! Avenger gave them one condition to escape, to get at least one happy end with their respective targets. Rated T for swearings.
1. Chapter 1

"Uuuuuugggggghhhhhhhhh! I'm bored! I'm dying of boredom!" Avenger shouted like a kid. He was seen in a really small room along with a few other people. "Shut the hell up you!" an annoyed voice resounded from the corner of the room. It was a man with black hair wearing green full body tights. He had a beauty mark on his frowning face.

"Whaddaya want ya punk?! I aint talkin to you Lancer 4th you rejected womanizer!" Avenger retorted back towards Lancer. "..." Lancer 4th hung his face, weeping due to Avenger's retort especially the last one.

"Hahaha! Now isn't the time to fight folks" a big hand patted Avenger's small, fragile shoulder. "Ow! That hurt old cunt!" Avenger took a step back caressing his shoulder. He shot a look towards the big bearded man wearing silver armor with a red cape on his back. "You don't have to treat him nicely Rider 4th" a calm voice called out to the King of Conquerers. "Ah Caster 2nd, as calm as always. Hahaha don't say that. He's one of us. Hahahahaha" Rider laughed abnormally at the comment the woman known as Caster 2rd made.

"DON'T SAY THAT?! AFTER THAT PUNK CAME IN HERE THIS WHOLE PLACE TURNED DAMN GLOOMY! JUST LOOK AT THIS PLACE!" Caster 2nd snapped. She pointed her finger to the dark, empty room filled with despair and gloomy fallen servants. The room used to be bright with a lot of accomodities to serve the fallen spirits before the 3rd Grail War. "Calm my ass" said a small guy sitting on the floor grinning. "You know that I'm joking right, Assassin 3rd?" Rider 4th patted Assassin 3rd's head causing his grin to disapear for a while. "HAH?! How is this MY fault you bitch?! There are also bunch of other spirits who came here with me and you choose to blame ME?!" Avenger marched towards Caster 2nd in anger. "Because YOU were the first one to DIE and the FIRST ONE to come here. Then, after you stepped your filthy feet into this room, the whole place turned like this!" Caster 2nd pushed Avenger halting his march causing him to lose balance. "Heck, YOU were killed by assassin. ASSASSIN! Look he's still smiling being the ONLY assassin to ever killed a servant" she pointed towards Assassin 3rd who had a big grin on his face looking mockingly towards Avenger. "Most of all... WHY IS THERE NO WINNERS YET FOR THE HOLY GRAIL WAR?! Its been years. YEARS I've been stuck here. And you scared off the previous to be winner you bastard!" Caster 2nd shook Avenger violently before throwing him towards Assassin 3rd. "Quit whinning princess" Assassin 3rd shove Avenger away before he could even land. "Wow...you're light...really light that its disturbing."

"They're...always like this..." a man sitting on the floor, hugging his knees said in the midst of the argument. He wore a full plate grey armor. His long purple hair spread across the black floor. "You said it Berserker 4th" another gloomy man sat next to Berserker 4th, hugging his knees. "How long are we...gonna stay here...inside the grail?"

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"Huh?!" Avenger shot up from his sleep. He was sleeping on the sofa inside the abandonned mansion. "Ughh...a dream huh? Well I feel good knowing those bastards back there are still in there. Hahahahahahaha." Avenger stood up laughing as if he had conquered the world. "Shut up Avenger" Bazzett threw the pillow she was using towards Avenger. "Oh sorry master" Avenger catched the pillow giving it back to his master. "We died again..." Bazzett said as she rose up from her sleep. "Yeah because I was useless...again" Avenger scratched the back of his head. The two of them had been dying miserably to either masters or the black entities either due to Avenger's uselessness or Bazzett's carelessness. "What are we gonna do now?" Bazzett dug her face onto the pillow silently weeping in fustration. "Hmmm... I have this plan...but I know you won't like it..." Avenger said in a low tone. Bazzett immidiately shot up on her feet throwing the pillow aside, wiping her tears, facing Avenger with a serious face.

"Tell me what is it" Bazzett looked at Avenger with eyes of expectation.

"You won't like it." Avenger backed away, _regretting_ he ever said anything.

"TELL. ME." Bazzett demanded, closing in on Avenger.

"...Okay don't tell me I didn't warn you..." Avenger held tight Bazzett's shoulders holding back his laughter. "So it goes like this..."

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 **My first real story. Yay! Anyway so thats the prologue to this story that I just literally thought of when I was scolded by a teacher this morning. Leave a review, correct me if I've done something wrong or just drop a like if you like it. I will be updating this if I have the mood to do so.**


	2. Chapter 2

'I died again. In the end I'll just die on the 4th day. Where did I die again? Oh yeah the bridge. Well I shouldn't have gone alone. Alright I'll bring saber with me next time.' Shirou thought to himself as his consciousness floated in the dark realm where the dead gathered. He could still hear the insults and curses from the jealous dead beings around him but he ignored them. 'Its almost time I resurrect back to the 4 days loop' Shirou's vision of the realm faded little by little until its completely dark.

"Hah!" Shirou opened his eyes, greeted with his room's ceiling. He got up from his futon then proceeded out of his room. "Ughhh... I still can't handle this headache after the resurrection" Shirou caressed the back of his head as he opened the sliding door to the living room. There, the rest of the Emiya household crew were there, Saber sat there gulping down the rice crackers on the table **wearing a Homuraha Academy uniform** , Rider watching the news **wearing a Homuraha Academy uniform** , Fujimura Taiga was sleeping on the table, Illya, **wearing Homuraha elementary uniform** was fighting over the rice crackers with Saber and Sakura was busy with preparing breakfast. 'Yep. Everything's normal' Shirou thought to himself, heaving a sigh of relief as he settled down on the table across from Saber and Illya. Wait.

"Saber...Illya...Rider... What- no, why are you wearing that?" Shirou stuttered, commenting on their uniforms. The three mentioned girls set their gazes on the dumbfounded looking Shirou. "Uhh...Its our uniform" the three said in unison with a rather confused expression. "Ah, good morning senpai. Breakfast's here" Sakura interupted, bringging in a pot of stew onto the table. "Sorry senpai could you help me prepare the tableware? I forgot to do it earlier" Sakura asked with a bright smile on her face. "Wait Sakura. Isn't this weird?" Shirou asked Sakura, sweating buckets. "Hmm... What is?"

"Look at them! Wait, are you seeing this? Their uniforms? Maybe I'm sick. I should lay down in my room" Shirou stood up, trying to exit the room. His eyes were swirling and his face was beet red from confusion. It seems like that ressurecting countless of times made him go nuts for a bit. "Wait senpai. I think you're still fuzzy from oversleeping so for now go wash your face. And yes, I saw their uniforms so calm down" Sakura held Shirou's shoulder reassuring him that he's not sick. After that, Shirou sat across the three girls with Sakura beside him. "Okay first of all, why and when did you three started wearing uniforms" Shirou asked the three while holding a bag of ice on his head. The three of them had a worried expression looking at the distressed Shirou. "Uhh...we've been going to school since the end of the war...and you were the one who registered us..." Rider answered Shirou's question, sweat dropped. "Okay now I get it... The plot has changed" Shirou said with a despair-ridden face. 'So the efforts I've been doing until now might've gone to vain' Shirou face palmed. "Umm... If we're done here...can we eat breakfast now?" Saber's and Fujimura's stomach growled while lookong at the stew on the table. Thus, they had breakfast together without anymore fuss. They ate in silence until Illya sighed. "Hah... How did you forgot that you registered us for school, Shirou? I actually got confused the moment you entered the room and didn't say good morning _and_ didn't praise Saber and Rider on how good their uniform looked on them" Illya had a devilish smile on her face. Saber and Rider blushed along with Shirou while Sakura's chopsticks resounded a crack. "W-w-w-wha-? I said that?! I didn't say that did I?!" Shirou stuttered looking at the little devil. Illya sat there grinning at the flustered few. "Ah! I broke my chopsticks... I'll get new ones" Sakura stood up heading to the kitchen leaving a pile of ash on the table which used to be a pair of chopsticks. "Uhhh... I'll stop the jokes here.." Illya sweatdropped continuing her meal. "Hey Illya don't make jokes like that" Shirou heaved a sigh of relief.

"Oh, then you don't agree that they look good in their uniforms? How cold of you Onii-chan..." Illya said with dissapointment in her voice. Saber looked at Shirou with expectation and anger in her eyes while Rider just glanced at him blankly. "Uh no I didn't meant it like that... Uhh...you two look good in your uniforms..." Shirou said scratching the back of his head. One thing for sure, its a good thing Sakura didn't seem to hear this. Saber blushed for a moment before gulping the rest of her food and whispering 'Thank you'. Rider just simply blushed for a bit before continuing eating. "Hmph!" Illya pouted after finishing her meal. "I'm going now since Sella and Liz are walking me to school today" Illya said as she stood up leaving the living room. They bid her good bye as they're just finishing their breakfast. "Ah! Fujimura-sensei we need to go to since today we need to prepare for the festival" Sakura told the still eating Fujimura. Relunctant, Fujimura grabbed a bread after finishing her meal. They both rushed out of the house since they're already late. "Later senpai. Be careful on the way to school" Sakura shouted before dissapearing outside. "Fuji-nee's been acting strangely since this morning... She's been pretty quiet" Shirou had goosebumps with just the thought of it.

"Shall we go Shirou?" Saber held out a hand to him. Rider stood outside the door reading a book waiting for the two. Thus, the start of Shirou's brand new four days loop has begun.

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 **Okay here's a new chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing! Since I'm in a good mood today Imma upload another chapter.**


	3. Chapter 3

Two figures stood on top of Homuhara Academy rooftop early in the morning. Heck, the gates to the school haven't even open yet. The school was devoid of human life except for the two. They stared at the closed gate dumbfounded. "Avenger..."

"My bad. I thought school starts around this time" Avenger knocked his head with a silly expression looking at the exhausted Bazett. "You **thought?** Tell me Avenger... Which school starts at **THREE IN THE MORNING?!"** Bazett stomped her feet while pulling Avenger's hair in anger. Avenger cried in agony from the pain of his hair. "Ughhh! Why did we spawn here instead of the mansion?" Bazett shot a look towards Avenger. Sweating heavily, Avenger explained to Bazett "Its because starting from today the events of the holy grail war will be mainly held here. Look! There's even a bed for you" Avenger pointed towards a sofa hidden in the storage room of the rooftop. However, it was futile. Bazett's anger increased drastically. "AND YOU EXPECT ME TO SLEEP HERE?!" Bazett pulled his hair harder while he screamed, begging for help. "What really happened actually? After you whispered to me your plan I went unconscious" Bazett finally let go of Avenger then scratching her own head. "Well, lotsa things happened back there but one thing for sure... I successfully changed the plot!" Avenger claimed proudly making Bazett more confused. "Changed the plot?"

"Shi-! I mean the circumstances has changed. Hahaha" Avenger laughed with faint nervousness in his voice. "Before, you need to kill the seven masters and servants but now the condition is different. Furthermore, we're actually at an advantage" Avenger continued. Bazett lightened up at the mention of advantage with hope in her eyes. "Specifically, what change took place on the Grail war condition" Bazett cleared her throat. Avenger's eyes darkened as he inhaled a large chunk of air. "You need to find choose any one of the male servants or masters then get a happy ending with the one you've chosen" Avenger explained seriously. Bazett kept nodding as Avenger explained the new rules for the war. But, something about the rules Bazett found rather weird. "Wait. Why only male servants and masters? How about the females? And what's a happy ending? And how do you know this is certain?" Bazett asked out of curiosity.

"Hah? Of course only guys or perhaps you swing that way? And happy ending is when you successfully raised all the flags for the partner you've chosen by either dating or having an event with them without screwing up all or some of them" Avenger sighed at Bazett's question denying her last question. Couldn't take all of it in, Bazett remained fazed thinking again and again what Avenger's words meant. "Wait. Only guys? Happy ending? Date?" Bazett chanted those words for about a thousand times. "Hmm. Yeah that's how it is. I'm glad my master is fast to catch on these things" Avenger nodded before grabbing Bazett's arm. "Now lets get you chang- Huh?" as Avenger tried to pull Bazett she won't budge from her spot. Suddenly, she violently grabbed Avenger's shoulder and made him face her. "W-w-w-what do you mean date?! W-w-w-why would I-I-I date anyone?! What happened to the previous rules? And what do you mean we have an advantage? I HAVE NO EXPERIENCE WITH MEN!" Bazett shook the fragile Aveneger violently before he fell to the ground, half awake. "Why would you initiate this plan? Why?!" Bazett screamed to his face. "B-because you asked me to...and...it'll be...funny-" Avenger fainted before he could finish his last words. "What do you mean funny?! Hey! Wake up! Change back the rules somehow! Hey!" Bazett was beet red and her eyes are spiralling. Panicking, Bazett ran around the rooftop looking for something to wake Avenger up that's safe enough not to kill him or break his body so she can ask for him to change back the rules somehow. In the midst of running around, Bazzet tripped landing face first losing her consciousness beside Avenger.

Exhausted, Shirou went to the rooftop to eat his lunch. "Ughhh... I can say that today might be bad but it have its own merits. Sigh Those two are acting strange. Rider kept ignoring me, reading her book and Saber won't stop clinging to me the whole day. Haaaah I'm beat" Shirou groaned. As he opened the door to the rooftop a shocking scene unfold before him. He dropped his lunch bread in surprise. There, two figures laying on the floor, one a male and the other female. Furthermore, the male is half naked while the female is...wearing a suit. Shirou picked back up the bread he let go and slowly approached the two figures on the floor. After closing in on the male, he poked his cheeks waiting for his reaction. "Hmmm... He's not reacting. For sure these two are alive but... Why are they up here?" Shirou stared at the female's boobs, drooling. He moved towards the female and started poking her boobs. "Hmm...no reaction too" Shirou kept poking her boobs relunctantly having no intention to stop. After 15 minutes, he grew bored to only just poking. So he planned to grope em' but since lunch was almost over he hunched over to the male attempting to wake him up. Just as Shirou was going to poke his cheeks, Avenger's eyes shot open resulting in Shirou screaming in suprise then Avenger joined in the scream with similar reason as Shirou.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

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 **Another chapter for today! I just can't somehow stop writing. Thanks for reading and drop a review if you like it.**


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